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Monday, March 22, 2010
the f word

Excerpt from The Good Eater


As the basket ball team made the four-hour drive to the San Luis Obispo basketball tournament (the biggest tournament of eighth grade), Coach Whitmore entertained us by predicting who we would all be when we grew up:

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Posted By newharb / 9:00 AM / Monday, March 22, 2010
Thursday, March 18, 2010
putting a stop to fatigue

Excerpt from Transforming Depression


How well you manage your attitudes and emotions each day determines to a large extent how much vitality you will experience overall. Most people think fatigue sets in because of all the things they have to do or because they didn’t get enough sleep. They often overlook the energy drain from out-of-control emotions.


Different triggers in life can cause stress to run through your system, creating frayed nerves, fatigue, and overwhelming, out-of-control feelings. Once this occurs, it’s important to recover from the stress fast, otherwise your energy drains away. Taking emotional responsibility to get into heart rhythm coherence helps to rebalance your system. Coherence also helps you develop the intuitive discernment to see how to stop draining energy and renew your vitality. This is especially important when you are trying to lift depression.

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Posted By newharb / 9:00 AM / Thursday, March 18, 2010
Tuesday, March 16, 2010
being content

Excerpt from The Mindful Path through Worry and Rumination


Do you become more easily aggravated, frustrated, irritable, or angry than you would like? Do you find yourself driven to tears, feeling overwhelmed or exhausted by things that seem to feel minor to other people? If you’re prone to rumination and worry, you prob¬ably do. Your stress response and your inner critic feed off each other, spending all of your emotional energy so that there’s none left for happiness and joy. One of the things that emerges with both secure attachment and regular mindfulness practice is a skill that psychologists call distress tolerance, which refers to the degree to which you can maintain your peace of mind, equanimity, and focus in difficult situations.

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Posted By newharb / 9:00 AM / Tuesday, March 16, 2010
Monday, March 08, 2010
helping kids deal with bullies

by guest blogger Susan Eikov Green, author of Don't Pick On Me.


All children experience some form of bullying. They may the target of a bully or they may be a bystander who witnesses bullying. We usually think of bullying as a physical act – pushing, shoving, fighting, hitting. But bullying can also be verbal – threatening, taunting, teasing, name-calling - as well as emotional. Being ostracized or being the subject of a rumor and gossip can be just as damaging as a push or a shove.


Of course some playful teasing is normal and children need to learn how to "give-and-take" in relationships. But bullying goes beyond that. Many children feel helpless and don’t know what to do when they are picked on. Their first reaction may be to either cry or get angry and go on the attack. They don’t realize that crying or fighting only gives the bully the satisfaction of knowing that whatever he’s done has worked! It won’t stop the bully – it will just make it worse.


But there are some simple strategies kids can learn to help them deal with bullies – strategies that will build their confidence and self-esteem so they can develop healthy relationships and friendships.


Discuss these strategies with your child.

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Posted By newharb / 9:00 AM / Monday, March 08, 2010
Friday, February 26, 2010
getting rid of the stigma of suicide, pt. 2

Excerpt from Choosing to Live


So, how shall we view suicide? Here’s what we recommend:


  1. Get rid of the stigma
  2. Adopt a problem-solving point of view.
  3. Keep an open mind.
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Posted By newharb / 9:00 AM / Friday, February 26, 2010
Thursday, February 25, 2010
getting rid of the stigma of suicide, pt. 1

Excerpt from Choosing to Live


You may ask, "Well, shouldn’t suicide and suicidal behavior be stigmatized? Isn’t it sinful, after all? Besides, we surely want to do everything we can to discourage self-destructive behavior."


We want to do all we can to prevent suicide and suicidal behaviors, but it is unlikely that laying guilt trips on depressed people will be helpful. Aren’t depressed people already some of the guiltiest-feeling people around? If guilt were an effective strategy, we would expect depressed people rarely, if ever, to commit suicide. Most depressed people already feel bad about themselves. A threat of moral condemnation is unlikely to have any positive impact on someone who already believes he or she is bad.

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Posted By newharb / 9:00 AM / Thursday, February 25, 2010
Friday, February 19, 2010
self-intimacy

Excerpt from Intimacy After Infidelity


Self-Intimacy is the moment-to-moment awareness of one’s feelings, thoughts, and needs as well as the willingness to acknowledge and own these to oneself and with one’s partner.


Why Self-Intimacy Is So Important

  • The Decision to be unfaithful is born here.
  • SI represents the best way to take care of yourself, especially with regard to expressing negative feelings.
  • SI is directly connected to your instincts.
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Posted By newharb / 9:00 AM / Friday, February 19, 2010
Tuesday, February 16, 2010
leaving little notes

Excerpt from Love Tune-Ups


Leaving little notes for your partner can add a wonderful zip to both their day and yours. You get to feel sneaky and loving at the same time, and they get a caring surprise. A love note is a simple, delightful way to bring you instantly closer, no matter where you are.

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Posted By newharb / 9:00 AM / Tuesday, February 16, 2010
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