Jeff and Lucy had been together for eight years. They’d gotten a lot of their life together worked out. Jeff cooked the meals, and Lucy cleaned the house. They alternated between his family and hers on holidays. Every month they put aside the same amount of money, in hopes of someday buying a home. They were both dedicated to their jobs, and they were looking forward to having kids in a few years. Everything was going exactly to plan.

But they’d both been feeling an encroaching sense of boredom. When they talked about it, they agreed that what they needed was something new. Something fun they could do together.

“How about a class?” Lucy suggested. “That might be fun. But I know I don’t want to do any homework. I’m too wiped out right now from work to use much of my brain tonight,” Jeff said. Lucy laughed, “Don’t I know it! But we’re getting a little too glued to the TV these days. If we don’t do something soon, we’re going to get stuck on the couch for good!”

A few days later, Jeff found the perfect thing: skydiving lessons! They’d always talked about trying it, even though neither considered themselves daredevils. Lucy agreed, but asked Jeff to make reservations before either of them could chicken out.

Five weeks later, getting ready to jump out of the plane, Lucy told Jeff, “At least we’re not bored now!” Jeff managed a half-hearted smile that looked more like a grimace. “Uh, maybe a few weeks of TV won’t be so bad, after this!” Lucy blew him a kiss and shouted over the roar of the engines, “Next time, maybe a cooking class will do! See ya down there!”

If skydiving isn’t your speed, here are some other pursuits you and your partner might try:

• Take a class together on something you’re both interested in learning more about, for example: martial arts, photography, home improvement, Spanish, the modern novel, music appreciation, or meditation.
• Switch responsibilities for a month. For example, if you always pay the bills, let your partner hold the checkbook. If your partner always cooks, take over the apron for a month. You’ll get a nice break from your usual chores and a new appreciation for your partner’s practical contributions to your life.
• Try something new in bed: act out a fantasy, do some role playing, have sex in an unusual place, read erotica aloud to each other, leave each other amorous notes.
• Get a new cookbook and try some foods you’ve never eaten before.
• If you never have people over, plan a party. Have people over for dinner, or create your own monthly film festival. Cook an elaborate meal together, or plan a potluck.

No matter what you decide to do, trying something new is always a good way to infuse fresh energy into your relationship and your life.

excerpt from Love Tune-Ups: Fun Ways to Open Your Heart & Make Sparks Fly by Matthew McKay Ph.D., Carole Honeychurch, Angela Watrous